If we took a holiday. Took some time to celebrate

I'm thinking of going on holiday this summer but to make a change I want to do nothing. Whenever I go away, I like to actually get something from the different culture, try new things and experience something completely different from my life in Britain.
This time I want to make a change, I want to go on a crappy sun-drenched holiday where I don't have to do anything except order cocktails from the beach. It goes against everything I usually do but I'd actually like to be a brit abroad, speak none of the lingo, just laze on the beach, and maybe, just maybe, relax, and return with a tan. I don't want too many ravers there, maybe something in a Magaluf stylee, where the flights are cheap, and maybe I could stay in a hotel (I'm sick of busy hostels), and I don't want to go sightseeing!

So I put this challenge to you! Tell me where I should go! Just post a comment, and maybe, just maybe, you could change my life! What an incentive!